you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I love you.
Bad choice
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