Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
