how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
