I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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