dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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