i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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