More tranny stories later!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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