member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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