i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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