Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
