At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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