Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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