If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
