i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
two words...techno handjob
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
