But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
