eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
