I'm gonna have a badass scar
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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