do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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