Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
