guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
