I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
