sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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