I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize