Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I want to be your penis for a week.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize