so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize