i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
