I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
