come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
