You made me cry and you don't even care
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
