Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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