Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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