I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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