You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
of course. lets lasso hookers.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize