why didn't you poke me back
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Soap is not a condiment
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
