Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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