I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Randomize
