Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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