How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Randomize
