Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
