he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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