PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize