We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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