508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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