i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize