I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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