i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
