so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
