Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
and she was petting her beer can
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
