So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Randomize
