She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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