it wasn't lemon gatorade
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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